The journey to being authentic is a process
It is not easy being authentic. Authenticity is not just about being honest. There is more to being a more authentic person. There is more to it than simply being honest with other people and yourself. There are so many layers beneath the surface because, in order to be honest with yourself and so that you can be honest with other people, you must know who you are and what you want. And that takes being honest about who you are so that you can decide what parts of you want to keep and what parts of you want to work on. There is no such thing as perfection anyway. The goal is not to be perfect. The goal is to be enough. And you become enough by loving honor and accepting yourself. What gets in a way of being authentic for a lot of people? Number one is just being able to sit down and know who you are and what you want.
We must give ourselves permission to accept ourselves. Many times, we end up being a chameleon because there is, this need to be liked by other people. And being liked by a prospective partner. And wanting to be accepted to the point that we lose ourselves. But, once you know who you are and what you want, you can attract what you want into your life easily and effortlessly. The root of manifestation is being authentic.
Another issue is if a person has insecurities, they often have them because they believe that they need to be something that they are not. Therefore, they are disconnected from who they are. It is impossible to be authentic when you are busy thinking that you need to be thinner or prettier, or smarter, or something else other than who you are. So yes, it goes back to self-acceptance creates authenticity. Being able to accept yourself fully is freedom. It is of true authenticity. Sitting down and being honest about who you are and what you want takes bravery.
And when I say bravery it is because society has geared us to be so busy until we forgot to really sit down with ourselves. Everything has become about having friendships and relationships. And who are you with now and how come you are single? There is a belief that you can be happy being alone or sitting with your own thoughts. When we really need to have a relationship with ourselves first and foremost, and often that is the hardest thing to do because it can be uncomfortable answering the question. What do you want and who do you want to be? It goes back to social conditioning. It is the expectations that are laid on us from parents, from family, from friends, and from romantic partners, to where we end up losing ourselves. Even if we do not intend to do so, meeting others, expectations cause this withdrawal of self and take us farther away from who we are. But then there is that fear of, “ if I am me, will I have the people in my life that I want in my life? “
Most of the time, you will. The people who are meant to be in your life will accept who you are. And the ones who do not guess what, are not in energetic alignment with you. And they need to leave your life because they are getting in the way of you becoming your authentic self.
The truth is that nobody could really get in our way except ourselves. We do it in subtle ways. We do it because of our fear or doubt or insecurities, our abandonment issues wanting to be loved, wanting to be accepted, and not healing. The pain that we have gone through in our past experiences, often dictate where we are in our life now. And the only way to get better is, to be honest, and so that you can overcome them. Are you holding yourself back because of past pain and disappointment? The number one way to be honest with yourself and to become more authentic is doing that painful inner work that is easier to avoid.
No one wants to dredge up old pain, but believe me or not, you must deal with it by feeling it so that you can heal it. That way you could become who you want to be without apology or guilt or thinking, who am I going to disappoint? It is more than working on your voice because you cannot use your voice unless you know who you are. And you are able to speak your truth. Once you are aware of who you are and what you want out of life. And again, you cannot attract anything. The universe cannot hear you. If you do not know what you want from it. If you are not receiving what you want. And if you do not have the ideal partner or the ideal job or enough money or the happiness that you seek, try to be honest and really look at what is not working so that you can decide what will work for you besides just doing the work.
How do you get there?
1. Work on your Chakra systems. Chakras are more than 5,000 years old. It is a valid part of who we are energetically.
2. Be willing to forgive yourself for not being who you want to be. And because you felt like you had to please other people.
3. Do EFT. Tapping and releasing that energy will reveal who you truly are and what you want in a more effortless way.
5. Do yoga, prayer
6. Talk to a therapist.
There are many ways to find your bravery. Sometimes it is shocking to believe that maybe just, maybe you are not living your authentic life. I know I have been there. I thought that I was my true self. I had old beliefs that were still present. One thing that I needed to change was that my work had to be hard or else it was not a real job. I wanted to learn to have fun at work. I really did not sit down and ask myself all the time when I want it and who I wanted to be until I ran across obstacles.
If you are running across obstacles, guess what? It is time to really do the work and soul search so that you can become who you really want? No one can give you that. Not a relationship, not a family member, not a child. Only you can answer that question.